Funny Island
by Chained and Tortured
Summary: Anzu Mazaki and Malik Ishtar are both lucky winners who get to go to funny island! Neither of them know that their both going together.And what happens when both their perverted guide's get crushes on Malik Ishtar?
1. Malik

Cat: Alrighty here we go!

Bakura: Your weirder then I am. And anyway what about me and Anzu?

Cat: I dunno. I guess I like Malik and Anzu better.

Bakura: (;;)

Disclaimer: Tormented Innocence does not own Yu-gi-oh.

"Malik! Wake up now!" Isis shouted. She had been trying to get Malik up for almost an hour.

"Mmmm hmm." murmered Malik sleepily.

Isis sighed. "You have ten minutes to get up."

Malik sat up and stretched. "Ok, ok." he said while rubbing his eyes.

Isis sighed and left, as soon as Isis was gone Malik fell back into his bed and closed his eyes.

Ten minutes later:

Isis sat down at the table. 'Look's like Malik's fallen asleep... again.' Just then there was a knock at the door. 'Post.' she thought getting up. She walked up and opened the door.

"G'mornin' Isis." said Bob (A/N: He's the post man.)

"Good morning Bob, I see that your still delivering post." said Isis as he handed her the mail.

"Yes well, I'll be getting back to building soon. When Jenny (A/N: That's her name right?) comes back." he grinned. 'Let's see Isis predict this.'

"Well then I suppose that will be next week." said Isis smiling a little.

Bob's jaw hit the ground. 'BUT ONLY I KNEW THAT!' "Just how did you- I didn't tell- That was a- Darn!" and he left.

'He's been trying to get me all week.' she put a hand on her M.necklace and sighed. She went back to the kitchen and sat down looking through the post. 'Bill, bill, bill, bill, oh Malik's won a trip to paradise island, bill, bi-' (O.O) "MALIK!"

Upstairs:

Snore.

Snore.

Snore.

"MALIK!"

Malik jumped out of his bed accidently hitting the shelf causing a few book's to hit him on the head

Thump.

Thump.

(X.X)

Isis ran up the stairs.

"MALIK!" she shouted again.

Malik rubbed his head. "Ra damnit woman! Did you have to scream so loud?"

Isis ran into his room. "Malik, tell me now. Did you sign-up for Tormented Innocence's contest? Win a trip to paradise Island?"

Malik raised an eyebrow.

**Flashback:**

**"Bill, bill, bill, ooh I can win a trip to funny Island!" 'What the hell is a funny island? Oh well, funny, right? Meaning that it'll be cool.' He put the magazine down and started looking at the question.**

**Q) What does Chained and Torchered do in her spare time?**

**Malik shrugged. 'If Chained and Torchered has watched the finals of battle city then she'd be worshipping me.' so he wrote;**

**Answer: Worshipping life-size pictures of Malik Ishtar.**

**'Ok now to post it.'**

**End flashback.**

"No, I don't recall doing so. Why?"

Isis held up the magazine at Malik. "Look!"

Malik took the magazine and read. It said:

**CONGRATULATIONS MALIK ISHTAR!**

**You are the winner of the contest! Out of 10 million people to enter, you and only one other lucky winner are going to funny Island! Your ticket is attached to the leaflet below. You will meet the one and only Tormented Innocence at the entrance to Paradise Island. Not only that but you also get fifty-hundred yen spending money! **

**WARNING: YOU MUST GET TO THE ENTRANCE OF PARADISE ISLAND AT FIVE O'CLOCK. ANY LATER AND YOUR FREE STAY WILL NOT BE FREE ANYMORE. **

(O.O) Malik's eyes went huge.

"Isn't it great? You get to go to paradise Island!" said Isis dancing around the room. "Now I can finally get rid of you!" she stopped dancing realizing what she said. "Ummm I mean. You'll finally make friends with someone!"

(-.-U)"Isis, you know that if I get there late then we'll probably loose all the money we have?"

Isis screamed. "NO! THIS CAN'T HAPPEN! I DESERVE A VACATION!"

(-.-U) "Isis _I'm_ going to paradise Island." reminded Malik.

"Yes, but if your not here then my life will be a vacation!"

"I feel so loved." said Malik sarcasticly.

Isis glared at him. "Get packing!"

He was about to argue.

"NOW!"

He nodded.

T.I: Ok please review! Please don't flame! Please tell me to update! Please don't laugh at the fact that I worship a life-size picture of Malik Ishtar! REVIEW!


	2. Anzu

**Monkeyluv: Wait 'till you read this chappie, you'll be pleased. First reviewer get's a cookie!**

**Sailer Charon: Thankyou, thankyou!**

**Ruby eyed girl: (O.O) Calm down, I updated. **

**Nile of Egypt: And that you shall!**

**Darkangelwp05: Thanx sooo much!**

_**Disclaimer: Still don't own YGO!**_

Anzu sighed and looked at her mail. "Let's see, mail, mail, mail, I won the trip to funny Island! Yaaay!"

"What's all the racket?" came a voice.

"Katie! I won the trip to funny Island!" shouted Anzu excitedly. "Hold on, I don't remember posting it."

"Ofcourse you don't!" said her red headed sister. "I filled your form up!"

"WHAT?"

"Well you see...

**Flashback:**

**Anzu bit her pencil. "What does M.L do in her free time? Ughh! How am I supposed to know? Let's the other optional question. What does Tormented Innocence do in her free time? Is this some kind of joke?" she slammed the magazine down on the table. "I'm going to the rest room!" she got up and walked up the stairs.**

**"Hmmm..." said Katie walking into the livingroom. "Oh a magazine! What does M.L do in her free time? Oooh if she's watched that whole battle city thing then that gal is definitely worshipping life size pictures of Ryou Bakura." So she wrote down:**

**Answer: Worshipping life size pictures of Ryou Bakura.**

**"Now time to post it."**

**End flashback.**

"You wrote the answer down as worshipping my friend?" asked Anzu amazed that her sister was so dense.

"Yeah! Isn't it cool? You'd better get ready! You leave tomorrow!" and with that Katie skipped out of the room.

(X.X) "I don't believe it." muttered Anzu. She sighed and looked ta the magazine.

**CONGRATULATIONS MAZAKI ANZU!**

**You are the winner of the contest! Out of 10 million people to enter, you and only one other lucky winner are going to funny Island! Your ticket is attached to the leaflet below. You will meet the one and only M.L at the entrance to Paradise Island, your partner will be meeting T.I since he/she answered the question about her,**

**Not only that but you also get fifty-hundred yen spending money! **

**WARNING: YOU MUST GET TO THE ENTRANCE OF PARADISE ISLAND AT FIVE O'CLOCK TOMORROW. ANY LATER AND YOUR FREE STAY WILL NOT BE FREE ANYMORE. **

(O.O) "Ahhhh! I have 'till tomorrow to get ready!" shouted Anzu. "Wait a sec. Do I even want to go? I mean I'm paired with someone I don't know and my guide is someone who worships life-size pictures of my best friend." she thought for a secound. "OF COURSE I WANT TO GO!"

She called the rest of the gang and told them where she was going.

XXXX

Cat: What? I'm out of Ideas but I promise the next chapter will be longer!

Bakura: Don't listen to her, she's evil.

Cat: (o.oU) Whatever. May I recomend some of my other fic's?

Bakura: No. You may not.

Cat: (-.-) I wasn't asking you bird brain.

Bakura: BIRD BRAIN?

Cat: I was asking the reviewers pencil neck.

Bakura: PENCIL NECK? THAT'S IT! (Jumps at Cat and attacks her)

Cat: (Choke) Re (Choke) Veiw!


	3. ML

Cat: (Falling backwards).

Ruby eyed girl: (Chokes Bakura then let's him go) (To Cat) Are you Ok?

Cat: (Dizzily) I think so. (Looks at Ruby eyed girl closely) I didn't know you had a twin.

Ruby eyed girl: (Backing away from Cat) (o.oU) I don't.

Cat: Oh. (Suddenly falls asleep)

Ruby eyed girl: (O.O) Who's gonna write the story now?

Ryou: (Smiling his sweet smile)

Ruby eyed girl: (Thinkinh: Awwwww KAWAII!)

Ryou: This is a rare case: (Walks upto Cat with a bucket of coffee). Mind you, It doesn't happen alot. But when it does ...this is what we do. (Opens Cat's mouth and spills the bucket of cofee in it) (Looks at ruby eyed girl who looks like; (O.O)X10) Get back.

Cat: AAAAGGHH! (Get's up) MY STORY! MUST WRITE STORY! (Starts writing story)

Ruby eyed girl: (O.O) _Wow!_

Ryou: (Blushes) Will you do the disclaimer?

Ruby eyed girl: )Happily) Sure! (Cough);

**Sailer Charon: (XD) Your about to find out!**

**Sugarontop1: LOL! I think you meant update!**

**Me: Updated!**

**Carolis: You get to meet the first one, lucky you!**

**Ruby eyed girl: Thanks for helping me out.**

**Darkangelwp05: Thankyou! Thankyou! **

**SilentMonkGirl: Updated, not soon.. but updated! (Run away from audiance throwing tomato's)**

**Monkeyluv4646: (Thinking: You gonna kill me, when you read this. (T.T)) Yeah...**

_**Cat doesn't own Ygo.**_

**Chapter 3-**

**T.I and M.L**

**Malik:**

"Goodbye Malik! Get to the airport safetly!" shouted Isis before closing the door of the house.

(O.o) "I get the strange feeling I'm not wanted anymore." Malik muttered. Then a little kid about five years old, walked upto him.

"Mister? Where ya' goin'?" he asked cutely.

Malik looked at him. "Your the neighbers kid." he stated matter-of-factly. The kid nodded. Malik smirked. "I'm going to funny Island." The kid smirked a really creepy smirk. It was then Malik noticed how weird the kid was.

"I see," said the kid mysteriously. "Who is you guide?"

Malik couldn't help but be freaked out. This kid was acting like Marik. "I don't really know much about her, only that I call her T.I or was it Cat?"

The kid's smirk grew. "You in for it now, mister. T.I she be really evil, she be. She learns from M.L, It's a good thing ye ain't paired up with her, M.L I mean." and with that he walked away.

(O.O;) Malik looked at his watch, slowly. to see that it's 4:30p.m. 'Darn! I only have half-an-hour to get to the airport!' he raised his hand up. "Taxi!"

A taxi came upto him and a man ith LOT'S and LOT'S of hair, asked; "Where ya of to bub?"

Malik swallowed. "The airport. I need to get there in less then thirty minutes."

The taxi mans eyes widened. "That's impossibe!" then he smirked. "What the heck? I'll get ya there in twenty for free."

(O.O) "Free?" 'What the heck is wrong with this freak?'

The man grinned. "I over heard your conversation with the, I did, and I feel sorry for ya'. So get in the car!"

Malik got his bags and put them in the boot all the while wondering if T.I or Cat, was really that bad.

"Hold on tight, now!" shouted the taxi man when Malik got in. He immidiately went to seventy miles per hour and a very, very loud;

"AAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!"

Was heard from miles away.

**Anzu:**

"Here put this in the suitcase!" her sister Katie threw her a blouse. "Oh, and this looks positively cy-ute!" she threw her a shirt with a teddy bear on.

(-.-U) "Hey Katie, you know your just throwing me shirts right? I mean, what about pants?"

Katie glared. "If you want to pack yourself then go ahead!" and she stomped out of the room.

(O.O) "What have I done?" Anzu asked herself. 'I have to get there in two hours and I jus told Katie I didn't need help. In her demented launguage anyway. Funny, I always wanted to understand that language but not anymore...' she started thinking to herself for about an hour. Then she realized what the time was. "HOLY HELL!"

Katie came into the room. "I thought you left."

(O.O) Anzu threw a pair of jeans in to her bag making the score:

12X shirts

2X pants

But she didn't have time to look. She closed her bag and ran, yes ran, to the airport.

**Domino airport:**

M.L looked at her letter. "I'm getting a girl, according to this." she said looking at it intently. Then an old lady passed her and put her hands together in a form of prayer.

"God bless the brave soul." she said and the rest of lobby muttered an 'Amen'

(O.O) "Come now, I'm not that bad." M.L said glaring at everyone. They cringed and ran away. (T.T) "Maybe I am." Then she smiled. "Atleast I'm badder then Cat." she looked at the time it was almost time for the flight, just half-an-hour. Her stomache grumbled. 'Awww man! Not now!' Then she looked around to see a staff member walking the opposite direction. "Hey John!" she shouted.

The boy stopped and gulped hoping it wasn't what he thought. 'Man, I must be cursed.' he thought when M.L ran upto him. "Yes miss?" he asked trying not to run away.

M.L grinned an evil grin. "I'm hungry. I need to feed." The boy lost color as M.L grew fangs. "Gimme your blood!" she shouted chasing him.

"Aaaaggghhh! Someone help me!" he screamed running away. But no one looked at him as though they were gonna help him. The only looks they sent him were ones that said; 'Are you nuts?'

"Ummm, miss M.L?" came a voice. Everyuthing stopped, the people wondering who would be stupid enough to talk to the demented girl and the boy mentally screaming in happiness as M.L stopped chasing him and looked in the direction of the voice. A young girl with brown shoulder lenth hair and blue ocean eyes walked upto her and bowed. "Are you M.L?" she asked.

"Ummmmm, yes. Last time I checked anyway."

The girls face lit up. "Thank heaven I found you! My name is Mazaki Anzu, I'm the winner of the contest! I can't wait to get to funny Island!" she said getting up.

The same old lady walked by and stopped at Anzu, a tear in the eye. "God bless you braveness child." and she walked away.

Everyone went; (O.O). But M.L barely noticed.

"Oh! Your the winner of the contest?"asked M.L. Then she looked more closely. "I've seen you before... YOU WERE ON THE BATTLE CITY BLIMP!" she screamed pointing at Anzu.

(O.o) "Umm, yeah."

Then a voice came out of nowhere.

**Remember Anzu. Maniac who worships life size pictures of your friend. (life size pictures of your friend) (Your friend)**

(O.o)

M.L glared at the sky. "Ra! I thought I told you to stop doing that!"

(T.T) "M.L, were gonna be late for our flight." said Anzu unsure if she still wanted to go.

"Just a sec," M.L smiled. "once I'm done talking to Ra, you can tell me all about Ryou Bakura." Then she looked at Anzu with an evil glare, "But you had better not be his girlfriend."

(O.O;;;;) "I'm not." muttered Anzu.

"Good." smiled M.L. "Now where was I?" a light bulb lit up on her head. "Oh yes... RA! GET DOWN HERE DAMN IT!"

Another bright glow came and suddenly Ra was in front of them.

(O.O)

"WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT CREEPING PEOPLE OUT?" screamed M.L, her eyes buldging out.

Ra cowered. "N-n-not to?"

M.L smiled maniacly. "THAT'S RIGHT! NOW BACK TO WHERE YOU BELONG!"

"Yes ma'am." and suddenly Ra dissapeared.

"Now let's go, before we miss that flight of ours." smiled M.L.

(O.O) "Yes ma'am."

XXX

Cat: (Sniggers) M.L ain't close enough to what I do to Malik in the next chapter. (Suddenly hits the ground)

M.L: You baka! I'm not _that_ scary.

Ruby eyed girl: (T.T) Yes you are. (Also hits the ground)

M.L: REVIEW... Or your next.


	4. Cat

Cat: (Sweatdrop) I updated? (Gits hit by a pie) (Grins) I love pie!

Bakura: (-.-;)

**_Disclaimer: Cat don't own YGO._**

Malik:

Malik looked around. The taxi driver had left him at the entrance, said he was brave lad, hugged him (Which was disturbing) and left. "Where the heck is my guide?" he asked himself.

A man came upto him. "Hola senor." the man smiled.

Malik blinked the growled. "I don't understand you!"

The man also blinked before he said. "Lo siento senor! I am very sorry sir! You looked spanish."

Malik growled. "Since when do spanish people have blonde hair, tan skin and violet eyes?"

The man grinned. "But senor, since when does anyone have blonde hair, tan skin and violet eyes? May I ask your name senor?"

"Malik Ishtar."

"Ah! Nice to meet you Malik! I am Tres."

Malik blinked. This man was confusing him. "Whatever, listen I'm looking for someone named Cat. Have you seen her?" He got even more confused when the man lost color and started stuttering.

"S-s-e-senor! L-lo s-sien-siento! I had no clue y-y-you kn-knew miss T.I! Come follow me a-and I s-sh-shall t-take you t-to h-her!"

Malik didn't haven time to question because the Tres pulled him by his shoulders and started dragging him.

Malik shouted. "MY STUFF!"

Tres stopped and quickly snapped his gfingers. A boy came upto them and the man said something in spanish. Then the boy turned tail and ran towards Maliks stuff.

"He'll bring them for you. Now let us go! We do not want to kepp miss. T.I waiting.

Cat/T.I:

Cat looked at the paper, she was getting a guy.

"Cat!" came a shout.

Cat's head shot up. Only her friends called her Cat, others HAD to call her T.I. She turned around and saw a dark skined girl standing above her. "Juanita!" She shouted hugging her friend.

Juanita grinned. "I decided to drop by. But I leave in five minutes."

Cat smirked. "Someone actually won my contest."

(O.O) "No way! Someone answered the question as you worshipping life size pictures of Malik Ishtar?"

Cat nodded. "Yeah. I can't wait to see who it is!"

Just then the same old lady that walked upto M.L and Anzu.

(A/N: Ra knows how she got there since there about 3 hours away from each other when it somes to planes.)

"God bless his brave soul." she muttered.

Cat grinned. "Hi grandma."

The old lady frowned. "Please don't be too hard on them. I've seen the girl, she is very innocent."

Cat blinked. "Were not gonna hurt them. Me and M.L haven't hurt anyone before, and you know it."

The old woman snorted. "Not physicly. But your mind games drive people crazy! Just look at what that friend of yours did to Ra!"

'Oh yeah...'

**Flashback:**

**M.L and Cat were in Egypt shopping.**

**"I think pink is sooo your color!" shouted M.L as Cat tried on a pink shirt.**

**"Ya don' say? I thought baby blue was!" Cat said shocked. **

**M.L's eyes landed on something. "What's that?" she pointed to a temple.**

**Cat grinned. "The temple of 'Ra'! What a joke! Ummm M.L?" Cat blinkd when she saw M.L walking towards the temple of Ra. "M.L! Were not allowed to go there! We'll be cursed forever!" screamed Cat her eyes wide.**

**M.L laughed. "Curse? What sort of a 'curse'?" she walked up on the first step.**

**"NOOOOOOOOO! M.L!" Cat screamed.**

**M.L rolled her eyes. 'Dramatic idiot'.**

**Just then the sunny sky turned black and there was lightning in the sky.**

**M.L's eyes widened. 'I'm a beliver!' she turned around and ran back.**

**"WHO DARES STEP FOOT IN MY TEMPLE?" came a booming voice.**

**"Excuse me sir." Cat said getting up and brushing her skirt like a little girl would. Then she smiled sweetly. "M.L didn't step IN to the temp-" **

**"RA!" the booming voice shouted. "No, hold on! I'm Ra!" Then the clouds separated and a man with the head of a hawk came down from the sky.**

**M.L got up and glared at it. "DO YOU REALIZE HOW MUCH YOU SCARED ME?"**

**Cat stepped back. M.L was younger then her by atleast half a month, but when M.L got mad... Gods.**

**Ra glared at her. "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU'E TALKING TO?"**

**"I'm talking to you bird brain! No! Scratch that! Bird HEAD! Hey Cat! Isn't that funny?"**

**Ra looked at Cat and Cat pathiticly smiled back. "Hi! I'm Cat people'z call me Cat."**

**(-.-U)**

**"MY ME!" screamed the so called 'Ra'. "You are CAT and she is M.L!"**

**M.L waved boredly. "Yeah, want an autograph?" she yawned. "Or would you rather have a picture?"**

**Ra waved at Cat. "You know. You were innocent minded untill you met her." he pointed to M.L.**

**"Yeah..." Cat said in dreamy voice. "Those were the days."**

**Ra glared at her. "So I shall kill M.L for turning the innocent into monsters!" he declared.**

**"Ok." said M.L looking at her nails.**

**Ra blinked. "This is the part where you grovel for your life." **

**M.L shrugged. "What's so great about living that I have to grovel for?"**

**(O.O) "PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!" Ra screamed.**

**End Flashback.**

Cat nodded. "Who knew Ra was so weak minded?"

Cat's grandma glared. "I'm leaving now. I have to go to the docters about my terrible back. I will prey for the two innocents." and she left.

Juanita blinked. "How is M.L neways?"

"Oh she's good." Cat waved away a fly.

Juanita suddenly screamed. "AAAAAAAAAAH! MY FLIGHT! Bye Cat!" and she ran away.

(O.O) "Ok! Bye!"

"Miss T.I! Here is Malik Ishtar!"

Cat's eyes went huge and Malik was, well, very creeped out.

XXXX

Cat: Yes, yes. It should've been longer.

Malik: Yes It should've been. What's with the spanish ne ways?

Cat: (Tears) Pierdo Eve!

Malik: (Oo) What?

Cat: I MISS EVE!

Malik: (BLink) It hasn't even been a day.

Cat: AND SHE'S GONE FOR OVER A WEEK!

Malik: (Gets an umbrella; opens it and put's it above his head)

Cat: (Tears no longer wetting Malik) Ahahaha!

Malik: (Trying not to drown) REVIEW!


	5. Begining of a long Journey

A/N: Thank you beautiful reviewers!

Disclaimer: I still do not own Yu-Gi-Oh!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Malik had no clue how he'd got on to the plane… which, he noticed wasn't built quite safely.

Last he remembered the Spanish man that dropped him into the clutches of a brown eyed, tan skinned brunette. Who, though looked adorable, innocent and cute had the strength of a professional wrestler, which explained why he was still being glomped and he couldn't feel a single bone in his body.

It wasn't his current state of body he was REALLY worried about; it was what was going to happen.

This brunette girl had introduced herself as Cat, AKA his tour guide. Right now she was bragging about someone called M.L and worshipping him and something else about Ra being weak minded.

He looked around the plane; they were going to get two more people, M.L as Cat had said and another innocent victim. He stared around at the plane again for the fiftieth time.

It definitely couldn't be safe; the chairs looked like they had been ripped out of cheap, broken down, old cars and the seat belts didn't look like they could hold on to each other any longer. The television was a cardboard box cut out and, sweet Ra, the thing that worried him most… there were only four seats! It was like a flying car for Ra's sake. He didn't even know WHERE the toilet was. Plus he'd have to, most likely sit next to the girl beside him, which scared the shit out of him.

Finally he decided to open his mouth and talk. "So…" he began.

Cat immediately stopped talking and stared at him with huge eyes. "Yes?"

He forced a cough and heard her gasp dreamily. He was really beginning to enjoy this. She seemed to worship his every move. If there was anything else on his mind it was that they were alone in the 'plane'. "Your Cat, huh?" For a split-second he thought she was going to scream in joy.

"Yes and your Malik, I worship you!" he suddenly felt her arms around his waist. "AND I LOVE YOU!"

'Wow,' he thought. Dazed. 'This woman has a very good grip.' "Yes I realized that when you first attacked- I mean, hugged me." He heard the footsteps. He blinked. He tried to see who it was but Cat was hugging him so that SHE was facing the door.

Suddenly, she let go and screamed. He grabbed his ears and dived down.

"Malik?" asked a soft voice. A very familiar voice, who was it?

"OMG! IT'S MALIK ISHTAR!"

He felt another pair of arms around his waist; this person he decided was M.L. He heard snorts of laughter and a few sniffs; he pushed M.L of him and got up. And for a moment thought he was going to fall back down.

There right in front of him was a stunningly beautiful creature with reddish-brown hair and cerulean blue eyes and LOTS of curves. A familiar beautiful creature with reddish-brown hair and cerulean blue eyes and LOTS of curves. "Mazaki?" he gasped in disbelief.

Anzu smiled and extended her hand in a greeting. "Hello Malik, long time no see. Almost a year in fact."

He shook it and heard an angry growl.

"Oh!" said the voice of the person who had jumped him earlier; he turned around to see a dirty-blond haired and green-eyed girl in front of him. Her teeth gritted. "Anzu knows Malik too." Before he had time to blink she was in front of him, shaking his hand. "I'm M.L. Nice to meet you. Cat," she pointed at the brown-eyed girl then to the cerulean-eyed one. "Meet Anzu. Anzu, Cat."

Cat smiled, pushed imaginary wrinkles out of her skirt and waved at Anzu, who smiled back.

'Looks like this one might be nice.' Thought Anzu. She turned back to Malik. 'He's so hot…. What am I thinking? It's Malik.'

"So!" they all turned to M.L. "Cat you fly the plane for two hours and I'll fly it for the next two hours, k?"

"Okay!" said Cat happily as Malik and Anzu stared wide-eyed.

M.L noticed. "Something wrong?"

Malik saw that Anzu's first impression of the plane was the same as his and then seeing that a KID was going to fly it? Yes they were teens, but barely, from the looks of them even sixteen yet.

"How old are you too exactly?" asked Anzu.

M.L opened her mouth, but Cat was the one who answered. "Were both still fourteen, ofcourse, I'm older then M.L only half a month though. I turn fifteen in July… eighteenth." She added. "And M.L in August… sixteenth, was it Ginny?"

"Huh?" M.L looked up. "Oh yeah, Azzy."

O.O

"So Azzy-" Malik was immediately cut of by and evil glare from both girls.

"Only I get to call her that." Said M.L

"Yes," said Cat nodding her head, her eyes half closed. "Only M.L, or there shall be dire consequences."

Silence.

Anzu coughed. "So, we're going to Funny Island, huh?"

"Oh yes!" Cat hit her head with her hand, then instantly started massaging it. "God that really hurt."

At the exact same time Anzu and Malik noticed Cat's accent. "Your British?" they asked at the same time. Anzu blushed lightly.

"Yeah, well actually I'm Welsh." She said making her way to another door. "Don't disturb me." She slammed it behind her.

"So," said M.L. "We'd better get to out seats, safety first!" she said cheerfully. But both passengers knew it was bullshit. "You two have to sit together if you don't mind." She said. "I've got a control unit in the other seat so I can make sure the-"Cough"-Plane-"Cough"-Is working properly."

They didn't ask. They were both afraid to know. So they sat down silently, the beginning of a long journey and they both hoped it would be safe and the lane wouldn't explode.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

A/N: I'm DONE! REVIEW ALL!


	6. THE GHOST OF CAT!

Cat: Yup! JUST ELEVEN MORE STORIES TO UPDATE! (Cackles)

Alex: (Sighs) No more coffee for you Cat.

Cat: CHICKENS!

Alex: (Shakes his head) Cat don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It had been an hour and everything was going smoothly until.

SLAM

WHAM

BAM

KRAM

Malik gasped as Anzu jumped onto his lap and buried her head in his chest. "Is it over?"

He was about top reply when.

"AGH!" Cat ran in and screamed.

M.L jumped out of her 'seat'. "What is it Cat?"

Cat ignored her and ran around screaming.

(o.o;;)

"Hey wait." said M.L suddenly, staring at Malik and Anzu with her eyes wide. "If Cat's _here, _then who's flying the plane?"

"..."

"..."

"Oh shit." Malik shouted running towards the controls, but before he got there he hit the ground. "OH MY RA!"

"What?"

M.L and Anzu ran in.

Cat was still screaming.

Malik's face lost color as he looked up at the man with eagle head. "R-Ra." he stuttered.

"So it's you again. What did you do to Cat?" M.L asked as Anzu stared.

You could feel fear vibrating of 'Ra'.

"D-death, to the kitty. DEATH TO _ALL _KITTY'S!" screamed Ra.

M.L sighed. "Ra," she rubbed her temples. "Cat isn't with the kitty's that once tried to eat you. She not even a _real _kitty- erm cat, she's just... Cat."

Cat was still, still screaming.

"Malik." said M.L

"Yeah?"

"Go shut her up."

Malik nodded.

"Anzu." said M.L

"Yeah?"

"Go with him."

Anzu followed Malik out of the room and they shut the door so M.L and Ra could 'chat'.

"So, began Malik as he stared at Cat who was eating his chair. "Who's flying the plane again?"

"I don't know and I don't care, as long as we live. Remember, there's still three hours of his torture to go." said Anzu grabbing Cat's legs and pulling her down. "You listen and you listen good. I've had enough of this. I'm PMSing and your annoying me to death. My legs hurt, my ears hurt and my _brain _hurts."

No way was Cat takeing that.

Five minutes later:

M.L walked out of the room holding Ra's hand. "So what do we say to Cat?"

"Sorry." said Ra.

"Good Ra." Then she sweatdropped. It was an odd sight.

Malik and Anzu were tied to their seats with wires and gagged while Cat was sitting next to them dancing the 'chicken'.

"Uhh, Cat?" asked M.L as Ra cowered.

"Yeah?"

"Where'd you get those wires?"

Cat pounted to the ceiling, which to M.L's horror was pulled open. "You know what Cat?"

"What?"

"Did you notice that the plane's going down? I mean it's not because of that obviously," she pointed at the ceiling. "Is it?"

"Nah, otherwise stuff would be flying out. I reckon it's more because nobodies flying the plane."

Five hours later:

They were in the middle of the ocean in a small life boat.

They were wet.

They were hungry.

They were scared.

"Damn." said Ra. "This just sucks."

M.L glared at him, "You know you can just poof out of here right?"

"Why didn't I think of that?" he asked.

"No wait!" But before the words left M.L's mouth, Ra was gone, in his place there was just a cloud of smoke.

Malik and Anzu glared at M.L.

"What?" she asked. Then realization hit her. "Where's Cat?"

They blinked and turned around. She wasn't in the life boat.

"HEY M.L!"

They looked behind them and sweatdropped. Cat was swimming with a... _SHARK?_

"HOLY SHIT! CAT!" boomed Malik. "GET THE HELL AWAY FROM THAT!"

"Stop, drop and roll Cat!" shouted M.L.

"Swim! Swim for your life!" screamed Anzu.

Their words met silence as the shark pulled Cat in to the ocean.

"Oh no." whispered Anzu.

"Shit." Malik stared at her.

"C-Cat," their eyes went to M.L who was crying. "I'm so so sorry. I shouldn't have- It was my fault- If I hadn't made Ra... JUST BECAUSE YOU FORGOT MY BIRTHDAY WAS ON THE THIRD OF AUGUST AND NOT THE SIXTEENTH! I'm so sorry!"

Malik and Anzu stared at her with pity. Not really knowing what the hell she was talking about.

"That's okay M.L." said Cat, sitting next to them.

Anzu and Malik's eyes widened at the brown haired girl. But M.L. didn't notice.

"No Cat, it was my fault. I was soo angry at you, because you forgot... and I made Ra come in. The plane wouldn't have crashed. Oh please Cat... come back."

"Okay." said Cat.

"I'll do anything Cat! I'll stop hitting you."

"Okay." she repeated.

"I'll be there for you."

"Okay."

"I'll let you sit in my chair!"

"Okay."

"Just come back!"

"Okay."

Malik and Anzu sweatdropped. M.L was... odd. She was still crying for Cat. Who was sitting next to them.

"How'd you do that anyway?" asked Anzu.

Cat blinked and stared at them. "Do what?"

"OH CAT!" shouted M.L. "I CAN STILL HEAR YOU!"

O.o

"HEY LOOK!" said Malik suddenly flapping his arms like a bird.

"That's not going to work." said Anzu. "I tried it, you don't fly."

"It's a SHIP! We're saved!"

In the next few minutes they were pulled on to the ship and handed towels and warm drinks.

"I-If only Cat was here too." sobbed M.L.

"But I am." said Cat.

"What?" M.L looked around. "Who said that?" Her eyes landed on Cat.

"IT'S CAT'S GHOST!" she screamed.

Malik and Anzu sweatdropped. But the sailors took her seriously.

They jumped off the ship.

(O.O;;;;)

Cat screamed. "WHERE?"

"THERE!" M.L pointed at Cat.

Cat screamed and ran to another location. "IS IT STILL THERE?"

"OMFG! IT'S FOLLOWING YOU CAT!... Cat?"

(-.-)

"Took her long enough." muttered Malik.

Anzu nodded. "Well, atleast we have a ship to ourselves," she said as she watched the sailors swim North. "And we can finally get to Funny Island."

Malik sighed and looked at Cat as M.L hugged her.

They weren't even half way there and he was exhausted. His eyes landed on Anzu, who was clutching his arm as her eyes drooped.

He smiled to himself.

But it was worth it.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Cat: Okay that was cheesy, but I still have alot more to do, I won't update till I get 60 review though, 11 for this chapter.

SO REVIEW!


	7. The President joins us

**Disclaimer: I don't own YGO, the Prime Minister, Her Highness The Queen or the President. Or M.L, or Mary.**

-

"Hello there. I am your flight attendant and I will be taking your order."

Anzu yawned and rubbed her eye tiredly. "M.L, why're you dressed as a sailor?"

"Cat wants to honor Britain for winning the revoloutionary war."

"But they lost."

"...So that's why I don't have a hot accent."

(-.-)

--

Malik watched Cat run out of the room. "Thank God that's over." he said sitting opposite Anzu and M.L.

Cat had, for some strange reason, been preeching, and crying, and screaming.

It had nothing to do with the Revolutionary war though. Or America. Or even Britain.

She'd told them about the time she'd broken her first nail...

Malik threw off his shirt.

(O.O)

Anzu's eyes were wide. "Holy-"

"Momma." finished M.L, drooling slightly.

A ray of light shone through the window onto Malik's well toned chest, showing off his tan skin and muscles.

"What?" he asked cockily, his eyebrow raised.

"I know exactly what we'll do today! Can you guys say hot tub? I can!" M.L stood up and started running out. "Cat! Cat! GUESS WHAT I JUST SAW?"

Faintly you could hear Cat shout; 'Was it a penguin playing a banjo?'

'No _better!..._And less creepy.'

Anzu sighed. "They're both craz-" she stopped as she felt warm breath on her neck and two strong arms wrap themselves tightly around her waist.

Turning around, her eyes wide, she turned to see a certain egyptian smirking down at her. Their nose barely inches away.

-

"Malik's really that hot?" asked Cat.

M.L wiped away the drool from Cat's mouth with a tissue. "Yeah. Really hot. Super hot."

"And you left that hot guy alone with Mazaki Anzu?"

"..."

-

Anzu put her hands on his chest, leaning foreward slightly.

Then suddenly the doors flew open.

"TIME TO GET OFF THE SHIP!" shouted Cat, jumping around.

M.L stood by Malik and Anzu and sighed dreamily. "Cat looks so happy, yet insane. Insanely happy. Inappy."

(O.o)

"Umm, right." said Anzu. Pulling away from the shirtless egyptian in embarassement.

Malik just frowned and watched Cat jump bounce off of the walls. "She's defying gravity." he said in awe.

"Yeah," said M.L. "She does that sometimes."

-

"I can't believe we're finally here." said Anzu as the ship stopped.

Malik nodded. M.L and Cat were at the Control room, though he wondered if it were a good idea to leave them there. "So, Mazaki?"

"Yeah Ishtar?"

"What were you going to do? Before Cat and M.L came in."

Anzu frowned. She didn't know herself. "I think I was about to-"

"Ahoy up there." came a bored voice.

Anzu and Malik blinked and looked down, searching for the source of the emotionless voice. They spotted her.

"Oh My God... It's a goth." whispered Anzu, horror struck.

Slowly she and Malik got off the ship.

"The name is Mary." said 'The Goth' emotionless. "And I'm very please to meet you."

"You don't sound pleased." pointed out Anzu.

"Oh, but I am."

"I don't think so."

"I'm a goth."

"Good for you."

"Mary-chan!" Cat jumped out of the ship like an ecstatic five year old.

M.L followed, not looking as happy. "Hi Mary." she said, emotionlessly.

"Yo." said Mary, they stared each other down.

Malik turned to Cat. "Why there a goth here?"

"Oh, Mary-chan grew up here. She's the only one who knows how to avoid the lava, swamp, man eating paranas, canabals, giant griffins and Ra's protectors who are hiding around here somewhere planning to kill M.L and I."

(O.O)

Twitchy eye...

Anzu groaned. "By the time we get there our vacation'll be over."

"Exactly why we we're offering a full money back guarantee." said M.L, finally.

"But this trip is free." said Malik, his eyebrow raised.

Suddenly Mary laughed and evil, evil laugh.

Anzu grabbed Malik's arm. "They're _all_ insane." she whispered.

Malik nodded, his eyes narrowed.

"They don't mean money back for you." she said finally, looking at Cat and M.L who were now investigating the body of a dead bee.

"Do you think this thing had sex with a bird before it died?"

"Ne, M.L, I'm not so sure that what 'The birds and the bees' means."

"Okay Cat, now you're being stupid."

"They don't?" asked Anzu, dumbfounded.

"Do you think hosting their advertisement, booking a plane and renting a private Island was cheap? If you guys don't get to the offcial Funny Island part of this island in seven days. I can guarantee you'll lose every penny you have. The other seven days are for pleasure if you get there."

Malik's jaw dropped. "WHAT? Is that even _legal?"_

Anzu looked like she was going to faint.

"You didn't read the small print on the form?" Mary gave a creepy smile. "No one does nowadays. People all over the world are betting on you."

-

Britain, London, Downing Street:

"Mr. Prime Minister sir, new just in, M.L and Cat have made it two the Island today. That means they have five more days to get to the official part with their guests whilst avoiding the obsticals."

"I see, keep me informed. The President of The United States of America, we bet they'd lose." he smiled charmingly.

-

Britain, Buckingham Palace:

"Your Highness, news has arrived of the two young women, they have arrived at their destination."

"Good, good, Wilson." said the Queen looking up from her breakfast. "Do keep an eye on them. Dismissed."

-

America, Washington, The White House:

"I demand a meeting with the president! M.L and Cat have reached the Island quicker then expected sir!"

The president stood up. "I had big bucks bettin' they wouldn't make it til day three!"

"Sir, there's a chance they may get to the 'Funny' part of the Island."

"Send in the air force!"

"Sir, we have a problem..."

-

Back on the Island:

"OMG!" screamned Anzu, pointing at the falling fiquire.

"IT'S A BIRD!" shouted Malik.

"IT'S A PLANE!" argued Cat.

"It could be God." said Mary blankly.

"NO! IT'S THE PRESIDENT!" said M.L suddenly. "And he _doesn't_ have a parachute!"

WHAM!

KABAAAM!

CRACK!

"Well, this Island is might soft." said the president. "Haha, I was worried I'd die since I'd left my parachute at Buckingham Palace."

-

Buckingham Palace:

"You did sabotage the presidents plan to ruin Cat and M.L did you not, Wilson?" The queen raised an eyebrow.

"Yes your highness. I stole his parachute."

"Good, good. I hope the bastard dies. How dare he hit on my daughter."

"...Indeed madam."

-

Malik's eye twitched. "Hey Mr.President, get your fat butt off of me."

---

Cat: Yay! I finally updated. So, what's going on? The presidents on Funny Island? Five days to get there while avoiding dangerous things and what's going on between the princess and the president?? ((O.o)) You may never know unless I update, so review!


End file.
